Chapter Text
Blitzø rings the doorbell to Ozzie’s apartment, wearing the only button-down shirt he owns (patterned with horses, obviously), and holding a bouquet of roses. He debated putting on a tie but figured that was maybe overkill. It’s been five days of Fizz ignoring his texts and calls. Seems like that’s the fad now. Everyone ignore Blitzø. But this mess, at least, is usually fixable.
Ozzie is the one who opens the door. He towers over Blitzø, with a huge grin on his face.
“Blitzø! What a surprise. It’s wonderful to see you, come in.”
“Yeah, nice to see you too, Oz.” Blitzø walks in, already scanning the room for Fizz. But the living room is empty.
“We missed you at the after party.” Ozzie closes the door behind him.
Then he bends over and scoops Blitzø up into a big hug. Blitzø squirms. “Put me down, you’re crushing the flowers.”
“Sorry! Sorry.” Ozzie puts him back on his feet. He runs a giant finger along the collar of Blitzø’s shirt. “Well don’t you just look adorable.”
Adorable. Ozzie is always saying sh*t like that. It makes Blitzø wanna scream. But even he knows better than to scream at someone as powerful as Ozzie. The guy never seems to get mad, but if he did it would be terrifying.
“I think Froggie is in his office. Do you want me to go get him—“
“Ozzie!” Fizz bursts into the room. “Why the f*ck did you let that piece of sh*t in here?”
“Oh. Are we upset with Blitzø right now?” Ozzie asks, with what really seems like feigned innocence.
“Yes!”
Blitzø holds out the bouquet of roses. “Hey, baby. I brought you these.”
Fizz walks right up to him, rips the flowers out of his hand and tosses them on the ground. “You f*cking promised. You promised you would come to the party. And what do you do?”
“I—“
“YOU DITCHED IT TO GO f*ck VEROSIKA.” Fizz gets right up in his face, jabbing a finger at his chest. “YOU HATE VEROSIKA. DO YOU HATE ME EVEN MORE THAN HER?”
“Fizzy, of course I don’t hate you. I can explain.”
Fizz takes a deep breath. He crosses his arms. “OK. Explain.”
f*ck. Blitzø didn’t think that far ahead. He rubs the back of his neck and looks at the ceiling. “Um, so I left with Angel. And then we did a lot of co*ke. And like. The night got away from me. But I absolutely was planning to come.”
“That’s it?” Fizz snorts. “That’s the best you got?”
Blitzø fishes the little velvet box out of his pocket and opens it up. A gold heart-shaped necklace, encrusted with rhinestones. Tacky, and obnoxious, just the way Fizz likes. Fizz stares at it for a moment. He takes the box, closes it, and throws it at Blitzø’s head. Blitzø’s half expecting it, so he manages to duck out of the way.
“I can’t!” Fizz throws his hands up. “I can’t with you, Blitzø. You’re a moron, and an asshole, and you don’t ever think about anybody but yourself…”
Fizz starts pacing, continuing the familiar rant. Blitzø stands there, trying to look contrite. Ozzie picks up the flowers off the floor and places them in the empty vase sitting on the windowsill. He carries them off towards the kitchen, presumably to put some water in them.
“... just why. Why do you do these things to me? Are you punishing me for something? It’s like you do everything you possibly can to sabotage the sh*t I set up for you…”
Ozzie returns and places the roses on the coffee table. Then he walks over to them. He picks Fizz up under one arm, and Blitzø under the other. They both splutter and protest. Ozzie walks to the bedroom. He deposits the two of them on the mattress.
Fizz huffs and puffs a little. But he’s already got that glint in his eye. At the end of the day, he’s a horny little bastard. He goes crazy for Blitzø’s dick. Has ever since they lost their virginity to each other. Back in the day, Fizz couldn’t get enough. They would sneak off to some empty corner of the circus at least a couple times a day to bang.
“I’m sorry, Fizzy,” Blitzø starts to close the distance.
An evil little smile slides across Fizz’s face. “Not as sorry as you’re gonna be. Ozzie, get my strap. And a co*ck ring.”
“Right away, dear.” Ozzie goes to the closet and takes a big leather-clad box down off the top shelf. He starts rummaging around in it.
f*ck.
It’s so f*cking hot when Fizz tops. Blitzø pretends he doesn’t like it all that much, because he’s not some kinda sissy. But f*ck. He’s getting hard just at the thought of it.
Fizz lifts his horrible Hawaiian shirt over his head, revealing the top of a leopard print bodysuit. He always seems to have slu*tty underwear on, no matter the occasion. He strips out of his pinstriped pants. Ngh. It’s a crotchless body suit. Fizz’s pretty little puss* is right there. In tasting distance.
So.
Blitzø does the sensible thing and tries to get between Fizz’s legs to eat him out. Fizz grabs him, flips him over onto his back. He holds Blitzø down by the horns and sits on his face. Blitzø is more than happy to oblige. He licks Fizz’s co*ck (it’s a co*ck, not a cl*t, Fizz has been very clear about that) in sloppy circles. Sucks. Sticks his tongue in Fizz’s hole. Does all the sh*t he knows Fizz likes. Because Fizz is the one who taught him to eat puss*.
“sh*t,” Fizz groans. His thighs are already starting to tense. Ever since he got on testosterone, Fizz is real easy. He used to take a while, but these days, touch him and he’s off like a rocket.
It’s probably Ozzie, too. Ozzie just oozes horny energy. It’s probably some sort of magic sh*t. Anytime Blitzø f*cks near him, he comes like twice as hard.
Fizz shudders and makes a mess all over Blitzø’s face. He rocks back and forth, grinding against Blitzø’s mouth. Eager for more. The bed dips beside them. Ozzie has undressed. He lies there watching them, slowly stroking his huge co*ck. He’s holding Fizz’s bright pink leather harness with his other hand. He’s set out lube and a variety of dild*s on the bed between them. It’s the leather co*ck ring today. The one that snaps on instead of rolling on. He’s both excited and dismayed that it seems like Fizz is planning to edge him to sh*t.
After a couple more org*sms, Fizz pulls away. He flops back onto the bed, panting.
“Ozzie. Get him ready. Then f*ck him.”
“Mmm… you want me to get him all messy for you?” Ozzie smirks.
“Yeah, creampie him, baby.”
Blitzø feels too warm all over. He loves and hates when they talk about him like he’s not there. Like he’s a sex doll for the two of them to use. Ozzie slides over to him, gently undresses him. Blitzø’s dick is throbbing as the cold air rushes in around it. Ozzie plants a soft kiss on the tip of it, then swallows it down. The man has no gag reflex. Blitzø hits the back of his throat and just keeps going. He groans, biting his lip.
“Hey!” Fizz smacks Ozzie on the shoulder. “I didn’t say you could do that.”
Ozzie pulls off. Blitzø whimpers.
“Sorry, darling. I got caught up in the moment.”
Ozzie reaches for the lube, flips the cap open and squeezes some out into his hand. Blitzø feels a slick finger brushing against him. He closes his eyes and tries to relax as Ozzie presses in. Blitzø never gets used to the sensation. It’s a strange sort of invasion, but doesn’t necessarily feel bad. In fact, it feels good once Ozzie hits the right spot. Blitzø lets out a little moan by accident.
“Yeah,” Fizz rolls closer to him. Presses up against him. “You wanna get f*cked stupid, don’t you, bitch boy?”
Blitzø doesn’t respond and thankfully is not expected to.
“Can’t wait to watch Ozzie fill you up. I wanna watch him f*ck you till you’re crying and pleading to come. Then I want him to stop. If you get to come at all, it’s gonna be on my dick. And that’s only if I’m feeling generous.”
Blitzø’s co*ck twitches. Fizz chuckles low and dark. He reaches over Blitzø. Then Blitzø feels the band of leather around the base of his co*ck, underneath his balls. Fizz snaps it closed tight. Ozzie slips another finger in and Blitzø clutches at the sheets. Ozzie has big fingers. Like two of them at once is the width of an average dild*. It’s not like Blitzø takes it up the ass very often. It’s a stretch.
“Are you doing OK, honey?” Ozzie murmurs, pressing a kiss against Blitzø’s forehead.
“I’m fine. C’mon. Give me more. I’m not gonna break.”
“Are you sure?” Ozzie moves his fingers just right and Blitzø gasps.
“Nghhh. Uh huh.”
Ozzie drizzles more lube and adds another finger. Blitzø is very full. It burns a little. He likes it that way. It grounds him. Gives him something to focus on besides how gone he is. Fizz kisses his cheek.
“I’m gonna make you f*cking suffer, bitch.” He whispers.
He cups his hand around the head of Blitzø’s co*ck. Then he switches on the vibrate function. It was a beautiful day when Fizz upgraded his arms to also be sex toys. Blitzø is on another planet. Between Ozzie fingering him and Fizz giving him the sexiest of robotic handjobs, he would have shot off like a teenager if not for the co*ck ring.
Fizz only lets it go on like twenty seconds before moving his hand away. Blitzø is not going to beg. Yet.
“Are you ready, Blitzø?” Ozzie withdraws his fingers.
“Yeah. Get on with it.”
Ozzie chuckles. Then Blitzø feels the blunt head of Ozzie’s enormous co*ck. Ozzie slides into him. Even with the prep, it’s a f*cking stretch. Blitzø can’t suppress the small broken noise. Fizz licks the side of his neck. Bites. Hard. Ozzie starts to move, slow and gentle. It’s still so overwhelming.
“f*ck him, baby,” Fizz groans. “Make him squeal.”
“We’ll get there, sweetheart. We gotta work him up to it a little.”
Blitzø needs something to hold onto. He grabs Fizz’s hand. Fizz squeezes his palm. Keeps biting his neck, leaving weird-shaped hickies with his snaggle teeth.
“How’s it feel?” Fizz’s voice is even rougher than usual.
“A lot.” Blitzø cannot put together a more complex sentence than that.
“Yeah. You love Ozzie’s big fat co*ck in you. Don’t try to hide it.”
Blitzø does love it. He’s starting to relax into it. Every thrust is a pulse of pleasure. His nerves are buzzing with anticipation. When Fizz touches his dick again, it’s almost enough to push him over the edge. Fizz must be able to tell, because he doesn’t turn on the vibrate setting. Just strokes his claws over Blitzø’s dick, teasing him.
Ozzie cups Blitzø’s jaw, runs his thumb along Blitzø’s cheek. “You’re such a good boy. Taking me so well.”
The words make Blitzø shudder. He hates it. Nobody else ever calls him good. He’s f*ckup. A disaster. A tornado that blows through and leaves nothing but wreckage in its wake.
“Hmm,” Fizz squeezes the base of Blitzø’s dick. “He’s good in bed, that’s for sure. But he’s been real naughty otherwise.”
“He just wants some attention. Isn’t that right, Blitzø?”
Blitzø opens his eyes to give Ozzie A Look. But Ozzie is just smiling down at him so sweet. He plants another kiss between Blitzø’s horns. It’s. Aggravating. Blitzø doesn’t like sweet. He likes dirty and messy. But also Ozzie chooses that moment to snap his hips deep as he can, and Blitzø in moans like a whor*.
“f*ck.” Fizz stops touching Blitzø so he can put a hand between his own legs. Blitzø hears the vibrator turn on again.
Ozzie gathers some speed. Blitzø squeezes Fizz’s hand harder. He can barely breathe. It feels like Ozzie is rearranging his guts. It’s awesome. Just the right amount of way too much. Blitzø wants to come so bad.
He feels Fizz shake apart next to him, whining through his org*sm. Blitzø wants to kiss him. He pulls Fizz even closer, licks into his mouth. When their tongues touch, everything lights up. Blitzø whimpers and Fizz swallows it.
“You two are so beautiful together.” Ozzie strokes his hand down Blitzø’s chest, brushing a thumb against one of his nipples. “I can’t wait to watch Fizz f*ck you.”
Yeah. Yeah. That’s gonna be great. Even if it means Blitzø isn’t gonna get to come for a while. It’s gonna be worth it. Fizz f*cks the way Blitzø likes. Rough and mean.
Fizz pulls back enough to say, “Make him messy, baby. I want my turn.”
“Mmm. You want me to come?”
“Yes. Come for me.”
Ozzie sits back a little. He grabs Blitzø by the hips and starts really pounding him. Blitzø can’t contain the cries and whimpers. He feels a little like he’s getting turned inside out. His co*ck is throbbing so badly. Every thrust is beautiful agony.
“You ready for it, Blitzø?” Ozzie squeezes him.
“Uh huh.”
“Tell me you want it.”
“Want it,” Blitzø slurs.
“You want me to breed you?”
f*ck. That’s hot. Blitzø isn’t going to say it. But he nods. And that’s apparently enough. Ozzie growls as he comes, grinding into Blitzø as deep as he can. There’s so much ji*zz. Blitzø can feel it leaking out before Ozzie even withdraws.
Ozzie flops over, stretching out beside them. Fizz reaches for his strap. He fiddles with the buckles and spends far too long picking out a dild* (of course it’s the biggest one). Blitzø is almost ready to break. Say, please, please, please, f*ck me Fizzy.
Once he’s finally got the strap on, Fizz grabs Blitzø and flips him over. He pulls Blitzø back onto his hands and knees. Blitzø’s limbs feel like jelly. This isn’t going to be sustainable. Then Fizz slams into him and nothing else matters.
Fizz knows how to angle it just right so he’s dragging against the sweet spot with every punishing thrust. Blitzø nearly goes cross-eyed. He’s screaming, he’s pretty sure. Hard to tell. Hard to think. He starts to collapse forward. Fizz keeps a firm grip on his hips so he’s face down, ass in the air.
“Who’s my little bitch boy?” Fizz coos.
“Me.” Blitzø whispers into the mattress.
“That’s right. You’re just a f*cking brat that needs to get dicked down so you remember your place. I own his ass.”
“Ngh.”
“You’re full of my boyfriend’s come because I want you to be. You belong to me. You’re my stupid little slu*t.” Fizz smacks Blitzø’s ass cheek for emphasis.
Blitzø feels so f*cking good. Fizzy’s right. This is where he’s supposed to be. At least right now. It’s so correct that he’s split open on Fizz’s dick. He needs this. It’s sin and absolution in one explosive package.
This is the only time he doesn’t worry that Fizz is going to leave him. The only time he’s sure that they’ll be together forever, just like they promised when they were little kids. The ground underneath him is solid. He can fall apart. It’s safe.
“Fizz,” he moans.
“What, bitch?”
“Lemme come.”
“I dunno. Have you earned that?”
“No.” Blitzø struggles up onto his elbows so he can speak without getting a mouthful of blankets. “But please?”
“Hmm.” Fizz smacks his ass again. “I think you can ask prettier than that.”
“Wanna come in you, Fizzy.” Blitzø forces the words out. “Wanna so bad. Please let me.”
“sh*t.”
Fizz pulls out. Blitzø collapses. Fizz struggles to get the strap off for a moment, then he rolls Blitzø over and unsnaps the co*ck ring. He sinks down onto Blitzø’s dick in one smooth motion. He’s dripping wet. Blood hot and velvety inside. Blitzø is not going to last.
Fizz starts to move. He rocks his hips, grinding on Blitzø’s co*ck slow and filthy. He runs his metal claws down Blitzø’s body, enough pressure to barely scratch skin. Blitzø is going to lose his mind. He can feel Ozzie’s come still dribbling out of him. Fizz is so tight around him.
“Can I?” Blitzø grabs onto the flesh of Fizz’s thighs, claws digging in. “Please.”
“Maaaybe,” Fizz drags his teeth across his lower lip. “I think you can make it just a little longer.”
Blitzø really, really can’t. He can feel the tension building. The intense tingling at the tip of his co*ck. f*ck, f*ck, f*ck.
“I’m so close. Please, Fizzy. I need it.”
Fizz stops moving. Blitzø actually sobs. Fizz plays with himself, rubbing his co*ck as he sits on Blitzø. Smiling all innocent.
“Are you sorry for being such a bad boy?” Fizz raises an eyebrow.
“Yes. So sorry. I’ll never do it again.”
“Don’t lie.”
“I’ll do better, Fizzy. I promise. Just. Let me.”
“Well… OK.”
Fizz starts moving again, just as slow as before. “Like this. You can come like this.”
It’s enough. It’s barely twenty seconds before Blitzø f*cking explodes. His whole body throbs with it. His hips jerk, he forgets to breathe. He almost feels like he’s gonna pass out. He makes a lot of embarrassing noises. Fizz keeps moving until Blitzø clutches at his waist and whines, “stop.”
Fizz lifts off him. Blitzø is a puddle. He doesn’t protest when Ozzie gathers him up. He sprawls across Ozzie’s broad chest, completely relaxed. He could almost fall asleep.
“Gimme a minute, boys. I gotta tinkle.” Fizz gets up and hops off the bed. He walks to the adjoining bathroom and closes the door.
Ozzie strokes a hand down Blitzø’s back. Keeps petting him like a dog. It’s nice.
“Mmmm. I love to feel you purr, baby,” Ozzie says softly.
Blitzø didn’t even realize he was doing that. Usually he’d be embarrassed. Right now, he’s too f*cked out to care.
“So.” Ozzie runs his other hand along one of Blitzø’s horns. “What’s got you all out of sorts? You only end up with Verosika when you’re really upset.”
Blitzø grunts. He doesn’t wanna talk about it.
“It’s OK, sweetheart,” Ozzie continues. “You know you can tell me anything. I won’t be upset with you.”
It’s true. Nothing seems to ruffle Ozzie’s feathers. He’s pretty old. At least, Blitzø thinks he is. And like. As the king of Lust, he’s seen a lot. He’s not judgy.
Fizz walks out of the bathroom and keeps right on going towards the kitchen. Makes sense. He’s usually hungry after sex. He tends to make big platters of snacks, bring them to bed, and get crumbs everywhere.
“Did Fizz tell you about the bird?” Blitzø looks at the wall, because that’s easier.
“A little bit. Prince Stolas, right? I haven’t seen him in quite a while. But he’s very handsome, isn’t he?”
“Yeah,” Blitzø mumbles.
“What happened, baby?”
Blitzø’s first instinct is to tell Ozzie to f*ck off. But like. Ozzie is maybe the only one he can talk to about this who isn’t gonna yell at him. Or get mad at him. When he tried to complain about Stolas not texting him, Angel didn’t wanna hear it. Fizz, obviously, would hate hearing anything about Stolas. Loona never wants to know about his love life. Maybe Millie. But she’d tell Moxxie, and that would be a whole Thing. So.
“Me, Stolas, and Angel had a threesome and it didn’t go well.” Blitzø sighs. “It started off fine. Then Stolas started crying when me and Angel were banging and locked himself in the bathroom. Then Angel got real mad at me. We’re OK now, I think. But… Stolas isn’t talking to me.”
“Oh, honey,” Ozzie sighs. “Did you all discuss things beforehand?”
“Stolas agreed to it! I don’t get why he’s so upset.”
“Well, did you and Stolas talk about your feelings for each other before bringing another person into your relationship?”
Blitzø isn’t sure what to say other than ‘no.’ So he doesn’t say anything. Ozzie keeps petting him. He seems to get the picture.
“Well, from the outside, it seems like you have feelings for Stolas. If him not talking to you is this upsetting.”
“He’s a good lay,” Blitzø grumbles.
“I’m sure. But if this were just about sex, I don’t think you’d be so worked up.”
“I just--I don’t know what he wants,” Blitzø huffs.
“Have you asked?”
Blitzø buries his face in Ozzie’s feathers for a moment before lifting his head up and babbling, “He told me not to text him. Or call him. He wants space. But everyone’s been ignoring me. Angel kind of responds but says he’s not gonna f*ck me until I go to this stupid communication seminar at the cult. Then Fizz wasn’t answering my texts. And. And Stolas said he’d call me soon but he hasn’t called me. So I started sending him stuff? I sent him chocolate, and wine, and jewelry from his ‘secret admirer’ because like, we’re not supposed to be together and if it got out that we were f*cking it would be kind bad. But he hasn’t said anything. And I don’t know what to do.”
“I see.” Ozzie wraps both of his arms around Blitzø and hugs him tight for a moment before loosening the embrace. “I think it’s good that Angel wants you to go to a communication seminar. Because you need to use your words.”
“f*ck off.”
“Shhhh.” Ozzie nuzzles against his horns. “Blitzø, darling, you’re very bad at expressing your emotions.”
He hates that Ozzie is right.
Blitzø doesn’t realize he’s started to cry until it’s too late. f*ck. He’s pathetic. Why does anyone put up with him? He should just go die alone in a hole. He always f*cks everything up. That’s what he deserves.
“Aww, sweetheart,” Ozzie squeezes him again. Gently pets him. “It’s all right. Let it all out.”
Blitzø sobs ugly into Ozzie’s chest. Stolas hates him and is never going to speak to him again. Angel just wants him for sex. Fizz and Ozzie pity him. He’s just their third wheel. Fun on occasion. But he’s not important the way they are to each other.
“Baby!” Fizz has apparently walked back in. The mattress bounces as he climbs onto it. Then he wiggles into Ozzie’s embrace and wraps himself around Blitzø. “What happened? Was I too rough?”
“Blitzø’s got quite a bit going on,” Ozzie says softly.
“Do I need to fight somebody?” Fizz kisses Blitzø’s neck. Strokes his horns.
It makes Blitzø cry harder. When Fizz is mean to him, he knows how to handle it. That’s how they are. They bicker, and poke at each other, and f*ck nasty to make up. He can’t bear the gentleness.
“I think he just needs our support right now.”
“I wasn’t actually that mad at you.” Fizz says too quick. “I mean, really, what did I even expect? You always ditch. You’ve just been so obsessed with that stupid bird lately. It’s like you forgot about me.”
Blitzø’s too choked up to talk. He can’t look at Fizz. He can’t look at anybody. He keeps himself firmly planted in Ozzie’s chest. Rising and falling as Ozzie breathes.
“I’m also not gonna quit. I know I said I would, but I was just pissed off. I didn’t mean it. I’d never abandon you like that. You know that, right?”
Blitzø does not know that. Someday, Blitzø is gonna screw up so badly, Fizz won’t forgive him. Blitzø won’t mean to. He just. It’s just. Everyone leaves.
“I love you.” Fizz curls his hand around the back of Blitzø’s neck and squeezes. “Together forever, just like we used to say?”
Blitzø does his best to nod. Love. Fizz says it so easily. Like it isn’t a noose around his neck. Like loving Blitzø doesn’t hurt him. Like he doesn’t care that Blitzø only says it back when he’s completely sh*thoused. Blitzø does mean it. He’s not sure exactly how he means it. He just knows without Fizz there’d be a gaping hole in his heart that would never heal. Fizz is a part of him.
But then there’s Ozzie. Blitzø is grateful that Ozzie has never made Fizz choose. Because Fizz isn’t stupid. He knows that Blitzø is poison. And if Fizz had to pick, Blitzø knows he’d be the one left out in the cold.
Eventually, the tears stop. Ozzie is gonna have to take a shower after this. There’s a big wet spot and snot everywhere. Blitzø is disgusting. He wants to slink away and hide. But Ozzie and Fizz stay wrapped around him.
Blitzø is exhausted. He’s f*cked out, and cried out, and he just wants to erode away into nothingness. He doesn’t mean to fall asleep like that. He just doesn’t have the will to fight it.
***
Blitzø’s apartment feels incredibly empty. He tries to avoid it as much as possible. He bothers Loona. Shows up at Moxxie and Millie’s several times, unannounced. He even interrupts them f*cking one time. Moxie is annoying, talking about boundaries, and privacy, and sh*t. Millie is nice to him. She makes him dinner and asks if he’s all right. Of course, Blitzø is fine. He’s fine.
He goes out at night to clubs, bars, and parties. He drinks. He does a lot of drugs. Has meaningless sex and lackluster org*sms.
It’s not enough to distract Blitzø from his phone. Or his phone lacking any notifications from Stolas. He sends flowers. Jewelry. Cute underwear. That stuff that works on Angel and Fizz. His efforts are met with more silence until he sends a Blitzø brand dild*.
He’s at some random fan’s house when he gets the text. He’s doing lines of Ketamine off a coffee table while the small crowd that has gathered around him cheers.
Please cease sending me gifts. My daughter and wife are asking a lot of questions.
UR WHAT??????
Blitzø flops back on the couch, wiping his nose. He’s going to have an aneurysm. Stolas is weird about Blitzø f*cking people and he’s married? Never thought to mention it? f*cking hypocrite?
I am legally still married. Stella and I are separated.
U DIDNT TELL ME UR MARIED
WTF
Why do you care?
You didn’t tell me that you were in a relationship with your manager.
Blitzø types ‘were not in a relatinship.’ It rings hollow. He and Fizz are something. He doesn’t know what exactly. Why is everyone so obsessed with labeling things?
fizz is my besty.
Who you also sleep with. It seems a bit more significant than your groupies. I would have liked to know about it.
Blitzø stands up and gets a massive headrush. The ground feels unsteady underneath him. He stumbles off to the bathroom and locks himself inside it. He puts his back against the wall and slowly slides down till he’s sitting on the floor.
The ketamine is making him all sappy. He just wants to hold Stolas. He wants it so badly. To be curled up in bed together, or tangled up in each other somewhere under the stars. He wants to hear Stolas talk about random sh*t he knows. He wants to kiss. He wants to hear Stolas laugh, or hoot in surprise.
im srry.
i miss u.
I miss you as well.
so lets hang out.
I need more time.
y?
Blitzø waits until someone starts banging on the door before typing again.
wut do u need more time 4?
“Occupied!” Blitzø snaps. But whoever it is doesn’t go away. There’s a muffled c’mon man, it’s the only bathroom in the f*cking house. So Blitzø drags himself to standing.
He walks out of the bathroom, then the house, still staring at his phone. He’s somewhere in Gluttony. It’s easy enough to flag down a taxi. The world is very fuzzy at the edges. His body is loose and his thoughts are dragging. He feels too soft and vulnerable. He wants to call Stolas. Hear his voice.
Eventually, Blitzø’s back in his apartment. He turns on the TV and curls into a ball on the couch. He thinks about all the ways he’s f*cked Stolas on these cushions. Then he thinks about lying together afterwards. Watching stupid movies. Eating takeout. Stolas had never tried ribs before, kept saying it was undignified, but then went hog wild after taking one bite and got incredibly messy. Blitzø enjoyed licking the barbecue sauce off Stolas’ feathers.
f*ck.
He’s f*cked, isn’t he?
He picks up his phone again, staring at the previous messages. He scrolls back to when Stolas was texting him like twenty times a day, just asking random questions and talking about mundane sh*t he was doing.
Do you like carnivorous plants?
Via keeps using the word ‘snatched’ in strange contexts. Do you have any idea what that means?
What are your feelings about scotch? I was just given a bottle as a gift. I don't know if it’s any good, but perhaps you’d like to try it together?
I’m quite sleepy today. I’m not sure why. Perhaps you simply wore me out last night.
He wishes he’d responded in more than single word answers. Now, there are a million things he wants to say. He doesn’t even know where he’d start.
ill b here.
Blitzø hits send and puts his phone down. Then he’s alone in the dark, with nothing but the flickering television for company.
